Tuesday, July 8, 2008

curb sandwich.

I love surprise texts.
I was sitting around feeling like a total douche Saturday night, watching Dances With Wolves with a bunch of 22 year old dudes. Yes, it is one of the best movies ever. Yes, it sounds sort of dreamy to be surrounded by boys as long as they are over 16 and under 45.
But I was having a vodka :::Really???:::: and I was getting sleepy and grumpy. Also, Subletter Eric had some amazing curry thing from Jaya delivered and I was jealous and bitter as all getup. He sat next to me eating it all happily internally gloating. Asshole.
Erics not an asshole hes a black nerd. One of my absolute favorite classes of human. And his girlfriend is funny. English funny. None of that is the point.

Surprise texts.
So Male Model Adrian texts me: what are you doing?
We don't text eachother. Thats where the whole !surprise! thing comes in. He and Fan were at Santos around the corner having some drinks and inquired if I would be joining them.

Yes, in fact I would, because I had already asked DJ Tight Pants to put me on the list.
What could be better than not paying to go in some stupid place?
Not paying for drinks once you are there!
These things occur for me so seldomly because I don't really go out enough. I mean I DO, but not in that way. I have no idea what I'm saying.

Mr Rapin was bartending upstairs, and the few moments of awkwardness were totally worth it because I like free drinks more than anything in the world, and I suppose you could use the word Friends to describe our interpersonal sitch at this point. Do I sound bitter? I don't mean to. Seriously. I'm not.

I don't want to talk about It.

Whats It? Everything that ever in my life made me look/feel foolish because of my girly girl feelings.

This post is about two things. The first thing, I am done talking about which is my surprise text which led to Santos with Adrian, Fanbaby, and my darling Ames.
Sidenote: I like Santos and I want to go back and dance. Because it has lots of room for that. Also the people there were weird. Gay bear daddies and pretty ladies and brooklyn folk and all kinds of non related humanity. Social algorithms~

So the other topic.
Adrian. Not just a male model. Actually I don't think he has been for like, years. That's how I am. I disrespect people by pigeonholing them. I'm sorry Adrian. You are no longer a pretty face.
you are now Garbage Man Adrian.

Adrian made these trash bags, pink with white polka dots. Maybe you have seen them, they are hard to miss.
I was reserved at first to jump on the bandwagon like, "Hey wow what an amazing art piece genius brain birthing"
First of all, tons of people do conceptual art that mixes in with the reality of our living space. And I'm never impressed. Wow, you threw paint on a sign somewhere and blared an air horn next to it every day at 7pm. Go fuck yourself. I just made that shit up right now and it took some artist 4 months developing the theory and 8 months to make it happen. Then they want to tell you what it means.
It means you had a bunch of crap ideas but this one seems the most capable of blowing the minds of the idiotic public.

Post rant:

This is not what Adrian did at all.

First of all, the pink trash bags all lined up look like a little army of tranny piglets by the streets edge.
I like it.
Secondish, darling Adrian actually has the follow thru to hire people to bag up EVERYTHING already on the street and put it in his bags. AND basically throw little parties on the days he does it.
Thirdish, most importantly, the bags are totally cutting edge. yes I said cutting edge. Like the movie with the ice skater and the hockey player! They fall in love even though they are soooooooo diff! Not kidding at all that is one of the great love stories of our time. I wish I was watching it right now.

Trash bags.
They are cutting edge.
They are biodegradable.
Big deal.
Oh because all other fucking trash bags ARENT.
Thats not sarcasm, they seriously arent.
They just hang out in the universe for a couple hundred years.
Non fiction.

Basically babyboy made this:

"Its made out of 100% biodegradable PVC that is naturally scented to repel insects and vermin. The scent is peppermint bubble gum"

I feel like that horrible guy, the one who sells things on infomercials, he started on the OxyClean tip, but he now covers all kinds of bases.
I feel like thats the vibe I'm putting out there.

I just think Adrian did a really great job.
And is still.
Hello art+beauty+saving the earth+being handsome+having garbage parties+being my friend=glory.
I love math.

I also just ate the hugest salad I have ever eaten in my life. I make really good dressing.

Lets not talk about me.

I realize now that doing shit to show you care about Earth is fucking cliche for out generation. GREEN GO GREEN GREEN. Green? Yes green. Lets do everything green because we have become our own catch phrase we are idiots are consumers.

But seriously biodegradable shit is the shit so there.
Im so eco whateverthefuck.

Further information for those of you who like being smart. Also for those of you who like to be on the scene. TRASH was in New York Magazine so you're cooler if you like it. Hows that for incentive assholes.

TRASH in SoHo // Dinner at Lahore
Thursday July 10
5pm - till the trash is picked up
$1 chai and $1 samosas

Installation in Base White and Oriyomi Gold TRASH bags
Sculptures throughout SoHo
Corridor on Prince St.

Dinner at 8pm
Lahore // 1st retail location for arp TRASH bags
132 Crosby St, b/w Prince and Houston


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