I'm really relaxed about things.

I feel like this is an example of exactly how horrible I am on my pain in the ass days:

(ps sorry Hoyt for blowing up your spot about how gay you are)

me: oh my god can i just say it
i fucking hate
coffee
i hate the smell
so much
jhoyt: coffee is slang for get a beverage
me: it smells rotten
jhoyt: of any kind when its too early to drink
well, I like it
so deal
me: what about the smell
jhoyt: Its different when you like it
me: when i smell coffee and im with someone else
i automatically dislike them

jhoyt: it forms a receptor that associates those molecules with heightened awareness
me: via association
jhoyt: even iced coffee? its not fragrant
me: i know what it smells like under the ice
jhoyt: well, sorry dude
just give me a mint, and I'll stay away from your nose until Im done
I love espresso
I used to hate it, but now, I LOVE IT
me: disgusting

me: when i dont like things
i really trul;y am grossed out
jhoyt: you can have soda
me: the trifecta is coffee, yogurt, and bananas
those three
i wanna throw up just seeing the words typed
jhoyt: like banana chopped up in the yogurt?
me: oh my god
fuck you
seriously
jhoyt: a parfait?
me: its disgusting
the worst part is kids love yogurt and bananas
but i cant touch or smell them
i get the willies
so i have to make them do it themselves which is really messy
jhoyt: is it a weird trauma thing?
me: i dont know
i just hate them
they smell like rotting corpse in my mind
jhoyt: when Im feeling lazy on weekends I get a stick of ostrich beef jerky and this really processed stiff creamy icelandic yogurt
SO GOOD
me: like decay
everything you say is so latent homo today
jhoyt: deal with it
you should bang the homo out of me
that would totally teach my coffee drinking yogurt loving ass a lesson
me: thats disgusting
talking like that with yogurt in the sentence
also ass
ass plus yogurt
plus coffee
plus the term bang
all of that was a nightmare


In conclusion, being friends with me obviously sucks.
Goodnight.