Monday, June 1, 2009

I would say that means you "enjoyed" it.

Too many things none are interesting.

Today was my first afternoon session with a new character in my life.
His name is Claude.
He is a doctor who reminds me of an actor.
I want to say hes like Willie Garson from Sex and the City.

But he's got something is in there as well to balance out the extreme gayness.
Plus, Claude has a wife.
Not that having a wife un-gays you, but whatever.
Not the point.
Claude is my new cognitive behavioral therapist, and he uses the word fuck randomly in discussion.
That is something I enjoy.
I hope he wasn't doing it because he wants to come off as 'relatable' to a young saucy bitch such as meself.
Anyway, I feel really good about seeing Claude every Monday afternoon, I think I will slowly but surely become less of an emotional extremist and more capable of non destructive behavior.
Talking about therapy on a blog may be TMI but NBD.

I have taken a lot of bad pictures in the last few weeks and have not cared to share them.
Because they are bad.

Speaking of bad.
I'm at my desk facing the window out to the courtyard where the scary stray cats rule.
Cinnamon just gently climbed in my lap and hissed quietly an her breath went directly up my nostril and it was disgusting.
She likes to hiss AT THE YARD whether or not she can see any other cats.
Thats because cats are stupid.
I mean, they are smart, but not smart like us.
At least they are not stupid like dogs.
Now everyone with a stupid dog is going to get pissed off but lets just face the facts, dogs are really dumb.
The end.

I was talking about bad pictures.
Here go.

Couple weeks ago we took a trip out to Rockaway.

Thanks for driving and making us lay in the back so cops wouldn't pull you over.

I have to dig a hole when I go to the beach.
Just the way it is.
I like the feeling.
I silently throw my self loathing inside.

We played frisbee.
Did some frisbahhh tricks.
Under the leg.
Behind the back.
Matthew McConaughey taught us.
Hes good at that shit.

Please find here an Ultimate Frisbee Slang dictionary.

Denise did this as usual.
Then she legally changed her name to Whatever, Man.

More beautiful than the beach are the sheets that hang from the 'shops' on Pike street come summer.
The chinamen use them to shade their little heads from the blazing sun.
Also to smoke behind and peek out from.

I would ask to buy this one, but its been hanging there for 3 years.
Swine fru.

Then at some point it was Levin's birthday.
Him and Stephanie did things like this:

Being their third wheel is not that bad at all.
I'm not being sarcastic by the way.

Getting drunk on your birthday means wearing sunglasses inside of bars apparently.

Later that night I saw Alice and she did things like this.

I just tried to google what the racist term for Australian is, but the only one even moderately funny is Dingo Fucker.
Sorry to say Alice, but you are now Dingo Fucker in my mind maybe forever.

Jen told me what she will miss the most when she leaves New York are the 10 dollar cigarettes.
Fine, go to a tropical island and spend 3 dollars a pack instead.
Won't miss you.
(please also note the gear of the guy behind her. then tell me who exactly he thinks he is supposed to be)
Speaking of the kid, Thursday night Don Voyage:

Then this existed.

A week later this shirt happened:



He cooked us chicken sausage and scrimp on the barbie for Memorial Day.
Then I dribbled a Spongebob Squarepants bouncy ball from 6th avenue over to ave A.
I suggest everyone take this as a challenge.
You will enjoy.

I bet whoever wrote this is a dickhole.

Then it was Kikis birthday the other day.
Cheap Shots plays a lot of Van Halen but at least she got to drink for free.

rarr rarr rarr

wait I need eyeliner.

Corrine Weiner came eventhough everyone hates her.

Audrey Hep or saaanthing.

They got me to Williamsburg for a party in a basement.


Molly and Raf did this for awhile.
Its called Pieeertah or something.
Art History.
I slept a lot.
Someone can google it and then correct me.

They do it better maybe.

People in Williamburg are so knee deep in their own shit, I mean ART, that they can hardly breathe.
Its amazing.

Now that I've insulted, generalized, and judged my work for today is done.
I have to watch the Bachelorette and eat noodles.

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