Friday, June 6, 2008

Never enough drugs when you're dancing

I found out this week that being less of a bore means being more tired than I like to be.
Dating is fucking exhausting.
You have to come home from work, take a shower, think about what to wear, look at yourself in the mirror like 85 times, put product in your hair, decide to wear a hat anyway, drink a beer to stop having a panic attack, drink pepto to stop wanting to throw up, smoke a cigarette, then brush your teeth so your don't smell like you smoked a cigarette drank beer and drank pepto, pee 48 times, then walk out the door to meet your date.
Then you actually have to stay up til like midnight all the while being amusing. Jesus Christ.

So Here some pictures of a couple things i did in the last 7-10 days.
It is all I can handle right now.




I finally watched Broken English which is maybe the greatest movie I've ever seen.I cried a minimum of 50 times, and maybe a max of 300 times. It was that emoto. Rotoemoto. I don't know what that means but I'm into it.
This is the guy Parker Posey falls in love with in the movie and I think hes kindve fucking a. may. zing.
Too bad hes gotta be about 5'6 125 soaking wet.




This is what Steph looked like last Friday night on the way home from Louie guy's bday party at Petes Candy in BK.
Everyone seemed a little sleepy.
Except Louie guy and Amber gal.
It was still a nice time though.
Steph and I tried to get a little sing along going of Jelly Man Kelly but no one else knew the words.
Tbones Denise does but she just sat there all smiley like yeeeeeeaaaaaaaaah maaaan I love this song.
Anyway I'm not sure but I think we were on the subway for a really long time then a shuttle bus because Brooklyn is retarded and I will never move there. The End.



My shoes make me a lady. Duh.
Speaking of duh, show of hands if youre down with bringing back the expression "no doy"
Any one?
Eh?
Fuck you I can bring it back myself.



Me and Owen get down with nature on a regular basis. Its just our thing. Sorta like how being a man who wears bras is Brooke Hogans thing.
ZING!
Seriously though, Goodbye Horses, B Hogan is tucking a giant weewee in her panties.



Little Sammy Davis Jr!
(he likes the birds)



Last Saturday I was 99 percent sure I was staying home for the night.
Then I changed my mind and went to Rehab to see Aloke and ended up remaining rowdy until 10 am the following day.
They are truly a really great live band if you ask me. Ive said it before. I will say it again.




Christian is becoming a ham on stage and its amazing.
Someone make a movie about it.
Heres him and Pam being good looking assholes outside.
Great job.



If I was a criminal I would choose Jess as my partner because she is insane.
You always need maniacs for success in that arena.
Naima on the other hand, not insane, but she did put up with Tyra shitface Banks for awhile on Americas Next Top Model, so kudos for that.



George Clooney was there looking like George Clooney.



I think its a rule that if your boyfriend is in the band, you have to be at least this gorgeous.
Emily is a good person to sit and have a drink at the bar with. Some people are just like that.



Somehow, despite the fact that she was born a man, Fan is really good at the whole lady thing. Shes like a black and white movie star. She does alot of smiling and giggling and fawning and gliding around. Its pretty unmatched. I love her.


1. No handsome man should make this face.
2. All handsome men should make this shirt.
*For more handsome guys in a good band, see Chief.
All bands referenced on my killer blog can be found by googling. Give it a shot.

That reminds me, story time.
So I'm having a drink, Aloke is on, jam out jam out.
Some girl standing next to me looks just like Kirsten Dunst so I ask how many times a day someone tells her that. She says all the time. I'm like oh that sucks. Shes like, "Yeah but I am her."
Classic Krissy foot in mouth moment, yeah?

Later I see her upstairs and casually say yeah sorry about that it must be awful. She starts telling me how people are taking pictures of her and asks me do I think she should just leave? Then she asks me to say something to the picture takers.
I recall my response was something like, "You're in downtown Manhattan. Everyone here thinks they are famous anyway. They don't give a fuck if you were in Spiderman. Chill out."
Keep in mind, that was meant to relax her?
I didn't do a good job.
Long story short, she is super nice, quite adorable and chatty though a bit panicked in general. I suppose I would be to.
Needless to say, I have no picture to accompany this story because I'm not THAT huge of an asshole.

I don't know what else to say except my cats, my dates, my job, my everything. Is wearing me out.
For the first time in months, my body hurts and I have no idea why.


Sidenote:
Its 11:30 pm Friday night and I am going to bed. After napping for 4 hours this afternoon.
Ballin

Meet me for brunch, your treat!

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